Thomas Guest (aka "the one with the freaky 70s shirt", aka "pitch Python as "high-level" language") invented statistics which look pretty accurate:
I’ve invented some statistics about the conference.
- 123% better attended than first predicted
- 72% of laptops used were apple macs
- 50% of keynote speakers were female
- 20% of conference organisers were female
- Less than 1% of the remaining delegates were female
- Sessions were 99% punctual
- Virgin trains to and from Bristol were 68% punctual
- Beautiful Code, a book I’d hoped to browse at the book-stand before buying, was 100% sold out just 10% into the conference
I think the only one he got wrong is the first 123% (my guess is 160%+), but only Midlands guys can tell. And hey, 3 statistics about female attendance... Thomas, did you hope to pull?
I'll add my own fantasy number too:
- 70% couldn't pronounce WSGI (whiz-gee? whis-ge-hai? double-u-es-WTF ?).
- 20% of attendees were Django junkie, 20% were Turbogears supporters, 20% said a prayer to Pylons before every meal, and 40% didn't really care as long as it got the job done.
- 100% of available large-sized Debian t-shirts were bought in the first 10 minutes.
- 90% of lightning talks were cut short (people talk too much! off with their time!).
- 10% of lightening talks were kind-of-related-to-Python-but-not-really (I'm not complaining here, just had a couple of WTF moments).
- 100% of the attendants to the PyQt tutorial loved the Trolltech goodies.
- 100% of dinner attendants thought Jono Bacon was funny, or they were already too drunk to notice.
- 20% of all clapping time was reserved to John Pinner. We should raise it to 30% by law.
- I didn't know 85% of North-West pythonistas who showed up.
- 3% of attendees got a prize. One of them even renounced his prize out of sheer generosity.
- 15% were over-50, which means it's never too late to learn Python.
- 15% were under-21, which means it's never too early to learn Python.
- 5% were labeled "Large Type" on their badge. I suppose it's better than "Medium Unbounded Variable" or "Extra-Large Exception".
- 5% of presenter used lolcats in their slides.
- 30% were a bit uneasy eating food bought by Microsoft, and made sure it wasn't poisoned before trying it. (MS geeks were awesome anyway.)